A woman hits up a guy in a bar
They go to her apartment and make out.
Then out of nowhere, the guy starts kissing her neck,
softly at first, and then it bursts into a wild ride of biting
and sucking, driving her into depths of pleasure she
has never had. The guy seems to be pretty experienced,
choking her and then stroking her neck smoothly.
She cries for more and the guy obliges, and they
share the most romantic and passionate night.
They suddenly wake up to the sound of breaking
glass, and a guy appears, wearing a ski mask and pointing
a 0.38 gun at them. “Take whatever you want, don’t
hurt us”, she cries. The bar guy is unfazed, and raises
his hand. It glows blue and then fades out. The robber
laughs, “neat party trick dude”
Seconds later, an undead skeleton breaks
through the door and tackles the robber to
the ground. The couple is quick to help the skeleton,
and they bind him with some wire. The skeleton bows
to the guy and dissolves into green smoke.
“That was awesome, how did you do that?”,
the woman asks. The guy replies, “It’s quite simple actually, I’m a neck romancer”
