His wife for his Young secretary

After 37 years of marriage. Jake dumped his

wife for his Young secretary.


His new girlfriend demanded that they live in

Jake and Edith’s multi million dollar home and since

the man’s lawyers were a little better he prevailed.


He gave Edith his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out.


She spent the 1st day packing her belongings

into boxes crates and suitcases.


On the 2nd day she had to movers come

and collect her things.


On the 3rd day she sat down for the last time at

their beautiful dining room table by candlelight put

on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay.


When she had finished she went into each and

every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped

in caviar into the hollow of all of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.


When the husband returned with his new girlfriend

all was bliss for the first few days.


Then slowly the house began to smell.

They tried everything cleaning mopping and airing the

place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and

carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters during

which they had to move out for a few days and in the end

they even replaced the expensive wool carpeting.

NOTHING WORKED.


People stopped coming over to visit. Repairman

refused to work in the house.


The Maid quit.


Finally they could not take the stench any

longer and decided to move.


A month later even through they had cut their price

in half they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.


Word got out and eventually even the local realtors

refused to return their calls. Finally they had to borrow

a huge sum of money from the bank

to purchase a new place.


The ex-wife called the man and asked how things

were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house.

She listened politely and said that she missed her old

home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce

settlement in exchange for getting the house back.


Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell

was he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what

the house ha been worth, but only if she were to sign

the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour

his lawyers delivered the paperwork.


A week later the man and his girlfriend stood

smiling as they watched the moving company pack

everything to take to their new home.


INCLUDING THE CURTAIN RODS…